HANDLE WITH CARE

*Note - This blog post was originally scheduled to air on Monday, July 2. Thanks to a limited internet connection and an abundance of time at the beach, its publishing was delayed. The management wishes to apologize for this delay, and encourages you to mentally travel back to a simpler time, like Monday, July 2nd, while reading this post...*


Tired of talk of Paris Hilton? Don't want to hear any more about Anne Coulter? Of course not! But just for fun, let's take a break from celebrity-news for a moment and talk about something that's of serious concern and presents a real threat to us all: fireworks.

That's right. If you haven't noticed, and even if you have, the 4th of July is fast approaching, which means it's time for the obligatory fireworks safety demonstration! Apparently, in addition to being really fun, explosi--, I mean fireworks can also be dangerous, and possibly even illegal... I think. Damn, I really can't remember. I wish there was someone who could tell me if these things were illegal or not...



Ok, so it seems they're probably illegal. But say I DID want one, do you know where I could get one?



Well that's good to know. And all this time I thought the brown paper bag meant I was drinking Jack Daniels! This explains why I never really got buzzed, but did find gunpowder in my saliva...

It seems a little counterintuitive to me that explos-- I mean fireworks could have any downside. Could you tell me otherwise?



She's right. It is a little hard to believe people are still playing around with these things. I mean, what IS the attraction that people have to explosive devises designed for entertainment purposes that are stimulating, dangerous, and exciting?

Next week, we'll explore a little known sport that's taking America by storm: sky-sniping. It's the thrill of skydiving mixed with the constitutional right of big-game hunting.

Until then...