Apparently, there was a Republican debate on YouTube - which is now on TV - the other night. As you might expect with the beginning of primary season drawing near, the questions are becoming more specified and the answers more informative. A prime example is the following clip, which concluded the evening's festivities:
It's nice to see Giuliani step away, if but only for a moment, from his general 9/11 platform and ascend to a new perch; that of World Series architect. I'm already seeing the promises... "if elected, he will deliver a long-awaited World Series Championship to AMERICA." I wonder what the t-shirts would look like...
On another note, former Massachusetts Governor and "resident" Mitt Romney made what appears to be his first easily-identifiable factual error. But I'm sure most Red Sox fans won't catch it. And even if they do, they're certainly not the type to poke fun at such an innocent mistake...
...then again...
Thursday, November 29, 2007
BOWLING FOR HOLLYWOOD
If you're confused about the on-going writers strike in the entertainment industry, the following video serves as demonstration of what the two sides are feuding over. If you're not confused about the writers strike, this video serves ice-cold beverages.
Monday, November 05, 2007
THE ONLY THINGS YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE HEARD FOLLOWING THE PATS/COLTS GAME
If you live and breath and exist in the world, you've probably already heard everything there is to know regarding the media-dubbed "Super Bowl XLI.v" between the New England Patriots and the Indianapolis Colts... EXCEPT for, perhaps, the following items which I've failed to seen mentioned on any post-game coverage, newscast, sports-wrap show, newspaper article, blog, or Monday Morning Toilet Paper (patent pending - it truly is the best way to recap all of Sunday's NFL action while your body recaps your gameday gluttony):
Now, onto the elephant in the room (which everyone is talking about, so I guess it's really more of the elephant in the circus): Will the Patriots go 16-0?
I'm not going to pretend I'm not intrigued by the possibility. What's even more intriguing is that my response to this question changes depending upon the way it's asked. Confused? So am I. Let me elaborate.
If you ask me, "Will the Patriots go 16-0?" I would be inclined to answer, "No. I do not believe they will. It's likely that they will lose to at least one team over their last seven games." I say this because I believe in giving thorough answers. Also, I believe it to be true when approached in said manner. Statistically and rationally, it's near impossible to go undefeated in the NFL. It's only been done once ('72 Dolphins) for a reason. Furthermore, no team has EVER gone 16-0 ('72 Dolphins played a 14 game schedule).
HOWEVER, if you take this game by game and ask me, "Will the Patriots lose to the Bills, Eagles, Ravens, Steelers, Jets, Dolphins, or Giants?" Using the same common sense as above, I would have to say "no."
That's also true. I can't envision the Patriots losing to any of the teams that remain on their schedule. The Giants and Eagles are good, but only by NFC standards (sorry, but true). The Dolphins should be motivated by the fact that it's their franchise's historic record they'd be protecting, but unless the 25 foot Jason Taylor robot is shipped over from England and plays in that game, motivation will only get them within 25 points. The Jets game will be less of a football game and more of a massacre for the transgressions of Eric Mangini. The Steelers are undoubtedly the best team remaining on the schedule; for whatever reason, this doesn't scare me at all. Maybe it's because they seem to be the same strong team that always loses to the Patriots. In a way, the Steelers are too good for the Pats to lose to them, if that makes any sense. If the Pats are going to lose, it's going to be to somebody who sneaks up on them. Which brings us to the only two games that scare me... The Ravens and the Bills.
Both Baltimore and Buffalo are aided in that they will be at home respectively for these match-ups. They also both have strong running games. They also both have that indefinite upset quality - strong enough to compete but easy enough to overlook (sort of like Secret deodorant).
So to sum up: will the Patriots go 16-0? Probably not; but quite possibly yes. There. I've had my cake and eaten it too. And it was delicious.
While everyone and their mother (particularly YOUR mother) was quick to point out how Joseph Addai single handedly tore apart the Pats - 112 rushing yards, 114 receiving - it's worth noting how these totals were achieved. 73 of those receiving yards came on one play (described to death by this point, so I'll save you the trouble or suffering through another). Even more noteworthy, while Addai gained 70 yards on his first 10 rushing attempts, he was able to grind out only 42 yards on his last 16 attempts. I take nothing away from Addai, who was very impressive to watch. However, let us also praise the Patriots defense, particularly the line, who were able to effectively shut down Addai in the second-half in order to put the Pats in a position to make that stellar fourth-quarter comeback.
- In a game where the Colts appeared to dominate the Patriots on the ground, they only ended up out-gaining the Pats by 14 yards - 119 to 105.
- Tom Brady looks amazing in crushed velvet.
- If it's possible, it seems like there were even MORE commercials starring Peyton Manning today. I'm not ruling out the possibility that he's filming them during halftime.
Now, onto the elephant in the room (which everyone is talking about, so I guess it's really more of the elephant in the circus): Will the Patriots go 16-0?
I'm not going to pretend I'm not intrigued by the possibility. What's even more intriguing is that my response to this question changes depending upon the way it's asked. Confused? So am I. Let me elaborate.
If you ask me, "Will the Patriots go 16-0?" I would be inclined to answer, "No. I do not believe they will. It's likely that they will lose to at least one team over their last seven games." I say this because I believe in giving thorough answers. Also, I believe it to be true when approached in said manner. Statistically and rationally, it's near impossible to go undefeated in the NFL. It's only been done once ('72 Dolphins) for a reason. Furthermore, no team has EVER gone 16-0 ('72 Dolphins played a 14 game schedule).
HOWEVER, if you take this game by game and ask me, "Will the Patriots lose to the Bills, Eagles, Ravens, Steelers, Jets, Dolphins, or Giants?" Using the same common sense as above, I would have to say "no."
That's also true. I can't envision the Patriots losing to any of the teams that remain on their schedule. The Giants and Eagles are good, but only by NFC standards (sorry, but true). The Dolphins should be motivated by the fact that it's their franchise's historic record they'd be protecting, but unless the 25 foot Jason Taylor robot is shipped over from England and plays in that game, motivation will only get them within 25 points. The Jets game will be less of a football game and more of a massacre for the transgressions of Eric Mangini. The Steelers are undoubtedly the best team remaining on the schedule; for whatever reason, this doesn't scare me at all. Maybe it's because they seem to be the same strong team that always loses to the Patriots. In a way, the Steelers are too good for the Pats to lose to them, if that makes any sense. If the Pats are going to lose, it's going to be to somebody who sneaks up on them. Which brings us to the only two games that scare me... The Ravens and the Bills.
Both Baltimore and Buffalo are aided in that they will be at home respectively for these match-ups. They also both have strong running games. They also both have that indefinite upset quality - strong enough to compete but easy enough to overlook (sort of like Secret deodorant).
So to sum up: will the Patriots go 16-0? Probably not; but quite possibly yes. There. I've had my cake and eaten it too. And it was delicious.
Thursday, October 04, 2007
[NEVER] LOSING ISIAH
Claiming that during his recent trial his head "never left basketball", Isiah Thomas is considering a new strategy for the upcoming season: being on trial.It seems that over the course of the three-week legal ordeal, Thomas discovered an ability to achieve a greater focus on basketball than ever before.
"Honestly. my head never left basketball, " Thomas said. "We made sure that we were prepared and I made sure I was prepared and I did everything that I had to do." Thomas claimed this was
contrary to all his previous experience, during which time he found it difficult to concentrate and stay lucid.So in order to continue this new found inspiration, Thomas and the Knicks have decided to keep him on trial. Since Thomas' most recent trial has just concluded, the Knicks are open to any and all new litigation to be brought against their head coach and president of basketball operations.
"Vendors, maintenance staff, knicks' city dancers, whoever!" Knicks' chairman James Dolan said excitedly. "Anything that will put Isiah back in the courtroom we feel will only help our organization."
Thomas is behind the idea 100%. "We came back extremely
focused... I just wanted to make sure we stayed focused and keep the team moving." Thomas went on to say if that means he continues being on trial, he's all for it.If you have a claim to bring against Thomas, you can file it with your lawyer, or directly with the Knicks at IwanttosueIsiah@newyorkknicks.com
DIVISION SERIES PLAYOFF PREVIEW - ALDS
VERSUS
Rejuvenated by a mixture of youth (pictured above) and experience (Clemens), the Yankees were one of the most formidable clubs the second half of the year...
That's all I've got. If everything went as it should, the Indians would win this series. Good pitching always beats good hitting, and Sabathia and Carmona, on paper, should put tribe up 2-0 going back to NY... But that won't happen.
Maybe Joe Borowski will blow a seemingly insurmountable lead; maybe A-Rod will create the five-fun homer. I don't know. But some how, the Indians, much to my dismay, will blow this.
My Prediction: Yanks in four.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
DIVISION SERIES PLAYOFF PREVIEW - NLDS
VERSUS
Did you know there was a playoff game this afternoon? See, this is what happens when you have a job - you miss the important things, like game one of the first round of the Division Series. Let this be a lesson to you kids: Never get a job. They just get in the way of Sports, TV, wandering around aimlessly, etc.
Anyway I don't think the fact that one game has already taken place disqualifies me from making an unbiased series prediction.
The Rockies come into this series as baseball's hottest team. They won an incredible 14 of their last 15, and actually came within ONE game of stealing the division title from Arizona - in fact, the Rockies expected win/loss record, as determined by run differential, is actually the best in the NL for the regular season. So, I guess you could technically say they under-achieved.
The Mets are the overwhelming favorite to win the NL. They're polished, talented, imens....
Hold on a sec I'm getting a message...
What's that? The Mets didn't make the playoffs?? Are you f%&$ing kidding me?!? How the F--- is that possible?!?!?! So who made it? HAHAHAHAHA.
I apologize. Before we continue, let me correct the header...
VERSUS
As I was saying, the Phillies improbable climb to NL East Champs reached it's peak on the final day of the season, as their win - coupled with the Mets loss - concluded a span that saw the Phillies gain 7 games in 17 days. Simply remarkable.
Unfortunately for the Phils, they won't have that much time against the Rockies. These two teams match-up fairly evenly on paper. But in reality, the Rockies have one decided advantage: they're not from Philadelphia.
Prediction: Rockies in five. And I swear, the Rockies winning game one did not influence my prediction in any way. If anything, I'm validated by it.
DIVISION SERIES PLAYOFF PREVIEW - NLDS
VERSUS
We all know about the Cubs. Disappointing start, and then they want on a tare in the second half, and finished up about right where they should have been: winners of the NL Central.
The Arizona Diamondbacks are one of the most puzzling teams in recent memory. They are the winners of the National League West - perhaps the most competitive division in baseball this year (with the exception of the Giants) - in addition to possessing the overall best record in the National League. And no one knows how the F%&$ they did it. They were outscored by their opponents on the season. Let me repeat that: THEY WERE OUTSCORED BY THEIR OPPONENTS ON THE SEASON. I can't think of ANY division winner in my humble lifespan that has ever scored less total runs than their opponents and managed to win their division.
The statistical anomaly that is the D-Backs doesn't end there. Arizona is in the bottom half of the NL in just about every conceivable offensive category, including dead last in hits, batting average, on-base percentage, and yearly uniform consistency (that's right folks. It's a joke about how often they change their logo/colors/font).
So how are they doing it? Well, for one, it's pitching. They're fourth in the NL in team ERA. Problem is, Cubs have even better pitching - they're second.
My Prediction: Everything on paper points to the Cubs winning this series... And yet I can't bring myself to pick them. Arizona just keeps winning. And there are two categories that they do actually excel in: triples (first) and one-run games (32-20 - tops in the Majors). I say Arizona out-triples the Cubs, wins three one-run games, and pulls out a three-games-to-two series victory, all while being outscored.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)